Court acts to stop arranged wedlock

A 16-YEAR-OLD Lebanese Australian girl has been placed on a nationwide airport watch list to stop her being sent to Lebanon against her will for an arranged marriage.

In what a magistrate has called an ”act of great bravery”, the girl sought a court order to stop her parents taking her out of Australia to marry a man she has met only once.

The girl, who cannot be named, approached the Legal Aid Commission in Sydney after her parents organised the wedding despite her saying she did not want to marry the man.

In the Federal Magistrates Court yesterday, magistrate Joe Harman granted an ex parte application and placed the girl on the PACE Alert system at all points of departure from Australia to prevent her parents spiriting her out of the country.

Mr Harman praised the girl’s bravery in using the legal system to challenge her parents’ authority. The girl, given the pseudonym Ms Madley by the court, was fearful of her mother’s reaction once she found out about her application, he said.

He ordered her parents not to assault, harass, threaten or intimidate her, or question her about the proceedings. ”Her actions in approaching the Legal Aid Commission, let alone this court, might be perceived as disrespectful of her parents and disobedient of there will,” he said.

He said the girl had displayed maturity not only by taking legal action to protect herself, but also in challenging part of the Lebanese Islamic culture in which she was brought up. ”It is not the right of any parent to cause their child to be married against their will, whether in accordance with the Australian law or otherwise.”

He said there was a psychological risk to Ms Madley if he did not make orders preventing her being forced into marriage she did not want, which he described as ”a principle that is contrary to all our legal processes hold dear and which would indeed, under Australian law, render the marriage void, as it is absent genuine consent.”

However, he said he was not criticising any culture that had arranged marriages. ”The arrangements proposed should not be judged or criticised from a Western perspective, but must be viewed through the eyes of those who live and appreciate that culture,” he said.

smh

  • Hannibal

    Describe it in one word: همج

    • 5thDrawer

      Freedom

  • Describe it in one word: همج

  • Describe it in one word: همج

    • Anonymous

      Freedom

  • libnan1

    Bravo Ms Madley, I salute your bravery …

  • Anonymous

    Bravo Ms Madley, I salute your bravery …

  • Leborigine

    This happens a lot in Australia and I am pretty sure it is happening in the USA, Canada and the rest of the world.
    Some Lebanese here are so backwards that the stray dogs in Lebanon seem more civilised!!
    17 years ago i asked an 19 yo Lebanese girl from Mishmish for her hand in marriage, and her father said that he would rather kill her than marry a Xtian man???!! 6 years ago I saw that girl again, she had 6 kids, abusive husband who was off the boat, overweight and looked way beyond her age, stay at home mother. 
    My question is, what kind of father allows this to happen to his own daughter?? Is it because that she is a girl that she cannot pursue her own destiny?? She was an absolute stunner with big goals, and he absolutely destroyed her life. 
    As a father myself, I would do anything and die for my daughter, and would certainly want her to succeed in her life.
    I just don’t get it, animals have more dignity!

  • Anonymous

    This happens a lot in Australia and I am pretty sure it is happening in the USA, Canada and the rest of the world.
    Some Lebanese here are so backwards that the stray dogs in Lebanon seem more civilised!!
    17 years ago i asked an 19 yo Lebanese girl from Mishmish for her hand in marriage, and her father said that he would rather kill her than marry a Xtian man???!! 6 years ago I saw that girl again, she had 6 kids, abusive husband who was off the boat, overweight and looked way beyond her age, stay at home mother. 
    My question is, what kind of father allows this to happen to his own daughter?? Is it because that she is a girl that she cannot pursue her own destiny?? She was an absolute stunner with big goals, and he absolutely destroyed her life. 
    As a father myself, I would do anything and die for my daughter, and would certainly want her to succeed in her life.
    I just don’t get it, animals have more dignity!

    • Anonymous

      It’s the ‘teachings’ and the ‘culture’ that lead to this.  Come into the 21st. century, travel, mix with other peoples and this will disappear.  This kind of sickness is propagated by leadership, both temporal AND religious.

    • If your saying in America if we try to protect the girls in cases like this yes we do, but as a practice (that of arranged wedlock) it does not happen here at all. The only cases are you guessed it Muslim. Same with the Canadian’s..That is my biggest problem with the Middle East, the subjugation of the weak, minorities, or sex ( or sexual orientation). For all this Arab Spring garbage, it will be meaningless unless you start to treat each other better, and quit trying to kill your neighbor. (Not you Leb, Just saying in general for the area.)

      • the star of your comment is “treat each other better” i cant  imagine  anything that costs less in life and does more good . sadly  when some comunicate via comments lack a humble approach in exchanging with others  often resorting to insults and harsh words for the sole purpose of making  them feel phsicologicaly superior. you are correct that regime change does not change everything.the culture itself has many idiosincrocies.

      • Anonymous

        The Japanese and some others arrange marriages too .. and many ‘send home’ for a partener, especially in these internet times .. but I have never heard of them killing their children if the kids were not happy with it … at least not in this century.

  • Ms Madley… I take my hat off to you, and I bow with respect and admiration to your courage.
    Years ago when I lived in Lebanon, it was the arranged marriage… It was the (crimes of honor) that made me sick. But of course it was always the girls fault, and the men were sent free. I respect customes and traditions, but when they are imposed on someone else’s life I will fight them to the last drop. It is sadl when you think of crimes of honor, but yet you give your daughter life and future to a complete strager. it is extremely sad when we force our kids inot misery and slavery, (yes slavery) in the name of religion, or tradition… We claim we love our kids, but we send then to these If my father or any family member had tried to force my sister to go into an (arranged marriage) I would have sent then to their last journey. She had every right to her own life and to her feelings and future and as long as she would have been happy I would be equally happy if she had married a Muslin, Christian or Druze… As the Lebanese always singing about the land, the love, the earth and the mountains… I would say it is time for whomever they are to crawl out of the caves, clinb to the top of the mountain and smell life and its aspirations… For those who can not climb!!! Let your kids see life, let then breathe the  new freshness in the air… Plain and simple!!! Let them spread their wings and soar the skies…    

    • 5thDrawer

      It is when ancient gender-based ‘customs’ are worked into political ‘law’ that they become an abomination – working against those who would rather decide their own destiny – in this case the choice of life-partners.
       Yet one must feel a little sorry for those who have been so ‘conditioned’ to only see a woman as an unfortunate product of their own probably-forced union with another, and to not have the same feelings of love for a daughter as for a son.
      Indeed, to feel if she goes against the ‘norm’ she should be punished or killed (often with prolonged savagery) because the ‘male’ feels he (it’s his family – nothing relates to his wife) loses some kind of (invented) honour … as it looks ‘bad’ to ‘others’ in his community .. has no place in modern society.
        Not counting the genetic problems associated with certain practices (well-documented in all histories), I think that in a time when the human race clamours for more freedoms, the laws MUST reflect that advance.

  • Ms Madley… I take my hat off to you, and I bow with respect and admiration to your courage.
    Years ago when I lived in Lebanon, it was the arranged marriage… It was the (crimes of honor) that made me sick. But of course it was always the girls fault, and the men were sent free. I respect customes and traditions, but when they are imposed on someone else’s life I will fight them to the last drop. It is sadl when you think of crimes of honor, but yet you give your daughter life and future to a complete strager. it is extremely sad when we force our kids inot misery and slavery, (yes slavery) in the name of religion, or tradition… We claim we love our kids, but we send then to these If my father or any family member had tried to force my sister to go into an (arranged marriage) I would have sent then to their last journey. She had every right to her own life and to her feelings and future and as long as she would have been happy I would be equally happy if she had married a Muslin, Christian or Druze… As the Lebanese always singing about the land, the love, the earth and the mountains… I would say it is time for whomever they are to crawl out of the caves, clinb to the top of the mountain and smell life and its aspirations… For those who can not climb!!! Let your kids see life, let then breathe the  new freshness in the air… Plain and simple!!! Let them spread their wings and soar the skies…    

  • Ms Madley… I take my hat off to you, and I bow with respect and admiration to your courage.
    Years ago when I lived in Lebanon, it was the arranged marriage… It was the (crimes of honor) that made me sick. But of course it was always the girls fault, and the men were sent free. I respect customes and traditions, but when they are imposed on someone else’s life I will fight them to the last drop. It is sadl when you think of crimes of honor, but yet you give your daughter life and future to a complete strager. it is extremely sad when we force our kids inot misery and slavery, (yes slavery) in the name of religion, or tradition… We claim we love our kids, but we send then to these If my father or any family member had tried to force my sister to go into an (arranged marriage) I would have sent then to their last journey. She had every right to her own life and to her feelings and future and as long as she would have been happy I would be equally happy if she had married a Muslin, Christian or Druze… As the Lebanese always singing about the land, the love, the earth and the mountains… I would say it is time for whomever they are to crawl out of the caves, clinb to the top of the mountain and smell life and its aspirations… For those who can not climb!!! Let your kids see life, let then breathe the  new freshness in the air… Plain and simple!!! Let them spread their wings and soar the skies…    

    • Anonymous

      It is when ancient gender-based ‘customs’ are worked into political ‘law’ that they become an abomination – working against those who would rather decide their own destiny – in this case the choice of life-partners.
       Yet one must feel a little sorry for those who have been so ‘conditioned’ to only see a woman as an unfortunate product of their own probably-forced union with another, and to not have the same feelings of love for a daughter as for a son.
      Indeed, to feel if she goes against the ‘norm’ she should be punished or killed (often with prolonged savagery) because the ‘male’ feels he (it’s his family – nothing relates to his wife) loses some kind of (invented) honour … as it looks ‘bad’ to ‘others’ in his community .. has no place in modern society.
        Not counting the genetic problems associated with certain practices (well-documented in all histories), I think that in a time when the human race clamours for more freedoms, the laws MUST reflect that advance.

  • 7akibalash

    shouldnt the australian police put her under 24/7 protrection now? her parents might diss-“honor kill” her. putting her name on a list isnt enough, my feeling is she will turn up dead or black and blue from head to toe.
    I applaud the 16 yr old child, her parents live in australia and still act like savage barbarians living in the deserts of jarabia. there should be a law against forced marriages in the west, her parents should be punished for emotional abuse, no child should be put through this crap.

  • Anonymous

    shouldnt the australian police put her under 24/7 protrection now? her parents might diss-“honor kill” her. putting her name on a list isnt enough, my feeling is she will turn up dead or black and blue from head to toe.
    I applaud the 16 yr old child, her parents live in australia and still act like savage barbarians living in the deserts of jarabia. there should be a law against forced marriages in the west, her parents should be punished for emotional abuse, no child should be put through this crap.

  • Anonymous

    shouldnt the australian police put her under 24/7 protrection now? her parents might diss-“honor kill” her. putting her name on a list isnt enough, my feeling is she will turn up dead or black and blue from head to toe.
    I applaud the 16 yr old child, her parents live in australia and still act like savage barbarians living in the deserts of jarabia. there should be a law against forced marriages in the west, her parents should be punished for emotional abuse, no child should be put through this crap.

  • master09

    Yse 5th, you said it with perfection. …..    have been so ‘conditioned’ to only see a woman as an unfortunate product
    and to not have the same feelings of love for a daughter as for a son.
     
    I remember of a family who did not want to see their daughter and have not wanted to for now 25 years because she married a Christian. It’s as if she is a pair of shoes with a hole in them
    .
    Thats why they don’t want women to be educated, men at 40 can still marry a 13 year old.

  • Anonymous

    Yse 5th, you said it with perfection. …..    have been so ‘conditioned’ to only see a woman as an unfortunate product
    and to not have the same feelings of love for a daughter as for a son.
     
    I remember of a family who did not want to see their daughter and have not wanted to for now 25 years because she married a Christian. It’s as if she is a pair of shoes with a hole in them
    .
    Thats why they don’t want women to be educated, men at 40 can still marry a 13 year old.

  • libnan1

    I bet her parents are supporters of M14 …:)

    • Hannibal

      M14 M16??? Are these weapons?

      • 5thDrawer

        Not very good ones … 😉

  • Anonymous

    I bet her parents are supporters of M14 …:)

    • M14 M16??? Are these weapons?

      • Anonymous

        Not very good ones … 😉

    • M14 M16??? Are these weapons?

  • Anonymous

    I bet her parents are supporters of M14 …:)

  • 5thDrawer

    The girl is brave for another reason.
      Anyone somehow getting their name on a ‘flying watch-list’ for whatever reason can never get it off all the ‘watch-lists’ that circulate MINDLESSLY on computers of the world – especially the American ones – as has been seen and experienced by many people with the same or even similar names to ones already there. Screws up future travel – one needs to allow an extra day + the 3 hrs when hauled out of the lines for ‘special questioning’ – which causes missed flights and total aggravation.
      Hopefully, she finds Australia interesting enough to stay in forever.

  • Anonymous

    The girl is brave for another reason.
      Anyone somehow getting their name on a ‘flying watch-list’ for whatever reason can never get it off all the ‘watch-lists’ that circulate MINDLESSLY on computers of the world – especially the American ones – as has been seen and experienced by many people with the same or even similar names to ones already there. Screws up future travel – one needs to allow an extra day + the 3 hrs when hauled out of the lines for ‘special questioning’ – which causes missed flights and total aggravation.
      Hopefully, she finds Australia interesting enough to stay in forever.

  • Anonymous

    The girl is brave for another reason.
      Anyone somehow getting their name on a ‘flying watch-list’ for whatever reason can never get it off all the ‘watch-lists’ that circulate MINDLESSLY on computers of the world – especially the American ones – as has been seen and experienced by many people with the same or even similar names to ones already there. Screws up future travel – one needs to allow an extra day + the 3 hrs when hauled out of the lines for ‘special questioning’ – which causes missed flights and total aggravation.
      Hopefully, she finds Australia interesting enough to stay in forever.

  • Fadi81

    unfortunately for her this is just the first battle of the war…Im sure her father for the most part has no respect for the law of the land especially when it pertains to his household and how it’s run…This will cause great “embarrassment” for the father back in the old country, people will surely “talk”…for this he will likely make her pay, I hope she has the strength to endure the madness of his potential Arab vengeance…

  • Anonymous

    unfortunately for her this is just the first battle of the war…Im sure her father for the most part has no respect for the law of the land especially when it pertains to his household and how it’s run…This will cause great “embarrassment” for the father back in the old country, people will surely “talk”…for this he will likely make her pay, I hope she has the strength to endure the madness of his potential Arab vengeance…