The Joke of the Day: Iran’s “divine victory” and Hezbollah’s hollow cheers

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By Ali Hussein , Op-Ed

Hezbollah’s latest statement hailing Iran’s “glorious divine victory” over Israel reads more like a punchline than a proclamation. After 12 days of fire and fury, which left southern Lebanon battered and Iran’s credibility bruised, Hezbollah has once again dusted off its favorite propaganda script: declare victory, no matter the reality.

According to Hezbollah, Iran’s war against Israel marked a “new historical phase” and delivered “precise and painful strikes.” But let’s pause for a moment. What exactly did Iran accomplish besides escalating tensions, inviting counterstrikes, and then scrambling to de-escalate through backdoor channels?

Let’s talk about that “victory.”

Iran, the self-proclaimed regional superpower, was so eager to avoid a real war with the United States that it pre-warned Qatar before launching missiles toward a U.S. base. Not only did this “lightning response” lack impact, but the pre-announcement exposed the desperation behind Iran’s chest-beating: it needed to show strength without risking a direct clash with Washington.

So much for divine wrath. This was divine retreat.

And yet Hezbollah, weakened after its own devastating war with Israel last year, rushed to declare Iran’s performance a win. It’s as if reality has no place in the narrative anymore — only slogans, recycled rhetoric, and shallow triumphalism.

The tragedy here is deeper than just propaganda.

Hezbollah has a long history of distorting the truth and insulting the intelligence of its supporters. After the 2006 war, which left Lebanon’s infrastructure shattered, it claimed a “divine victory” while the country mourned its dead and counted its losses. Now, with Iran reeling from internal unrest, economic collapse, and military embarrassment, Hezbollah continues to serve as Tehran’s mouthpiece — not Lebanon’s defender.

In fact, this is not just about delusion; it’s about deception.

The Lebanese people — and particularly the Shiite community — deserve better than a leadership that treats them as pawns in someone else’s power game. They deserve honesty. They deserve peace. They deserve the truth: that Iran’s strategy is collapsing, that Hezbollah is isolated, and that every false “victory” comes at the cost of more pain for Lebanon.

In the age of smartphones and open communication, it is no longer possible to fool everyone all the time. Hezbollah can issue its grandiose statements, but the people know better. They see through the spin. They feel the cost. And they are growing tired of being asked to sacrifice for foreign agendas that bring no real change — only more devastation.

It’s time for Hezbollah to drop the slogans and come clean. The era of divine victories is over. The era of accountability must begin.

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